going cold turkey.

by @according2kelly on July 23, 2008

it’s no secret that i have an addiction. it started slowly & innocently enough… just a little here, and maybe some there. i rarely did it home & i tried to not let it take over my life. for a while i was in complete and total denial. i just did not want to admit i had a problem, it was much easier to justify it. over time that denial turned to anger. anger at the people around me for letting it get so far, anger at me, anger at my suppliers. it wasn’t long before i was bargaining for it. i would tell myself… just on thursdays, i would do it. or, only if i was having a crappy day. that lead to a bit of depression… why couldn’t i just have it? seriously, what was the big deal? and finally, i think, hopefully i’ve made it to acceptance. i mean, here i am admitting that i have a problem – that’s gotta count for something, right?

so i’ve realized & accepted the fact that i have a problem. i guess the next step in this painful journey of self-discovery is doing something about it. so sunday night i made a drastic decision to go cold turkey. i guess i could have cut my drugs of choice out of life at a slow and steady pace. but really & truly, deep down inside i just knew that wouldn’t work – i’m an all or nothing kinda girl. & i’m proud to report that i’ve made it this far. i’m not going to say it has been easy, & believe i’ve been tempted a time or two (it’s hard to say no, when everyone else is doing it). but, i’ve stayed strong. that’s right! cherry coke, dr. pepper & regular coke… you aren’t going to get the best of me! i’m going to win this battle. wish me luck.


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